In Search of Perfection
It’s hard to find a role model these days-a perfect 10. Perfect body shape, star athlete, honor student, volunteer extraordinaire, successful career, impeccable moral character, super mom, friendly, beautiful, etc. are "perfect" traits-not in any particular order, though. Yale University Professor of Psychiatry Golan Shahar, Ph.D., says, "It’s a contemporary epidemic. Experts tell us that perfectionists don’t just set high goals, their objectives are so unrealistic that they almost guarantee failure. Even success can bring sadness to a perfectionist. Rather than taking a deep sigh of recognition for achievement, they immediately look around for what’s next."
More than half of all women are perfectionists, and up to 10 percent are so much so that depression, eating disorders, and contemplating suicide are serious issues for them. Even milder forms of perfectionism can rob one of happiness. Use of anti-depressants, treatment for anorexia, obesity, and suicide aren’t just national statistics-central Illinois has contributed to those increasing numbers.
The need to excel seems to be present at younger and younger ages. Beginning with pre-school enrollment, children are encouraged to be perfect darlings. While some behavior is inherent, other perfectionist traits are imposed. Television and the Internet have turned everything into a competition-from owning the coolest toys to sculpting your abs into a "six pack." Today’s culture encourages stardom with voyeuristic television shows portraying every family next door as successful millionaires. Easy credit and instant access to information encourage a lifestyle that took years for our parents to achieve, if they ever did. The failure for perfectionists is in not "arriving" fast enough.
What’s the price for compulsively seeking perfection? Sacrificing one’s happiness and sanity for a perception that others really don’t care about? Placing ultimate trust and confidence in those we perceive as perfect? Recently, religious leaders, business executives, political personalities, entertainment and sports figures, and even war heroes have suddenly toppled from their pedestals, shattering our perfect image of them. Equally damaging is holding ourselves to unattainable standards. Relationships of any kind prove difficult.
I frequently use the word "perfect" to describe my approval for something or someone but know the definition itself is flawed. The best we can do. Satisfaction in a job well done. Health. Happiness. Contentment and peace with life. Each must seek those ideals according to her own opinion of perfect.
"God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change…Courage to change the things I can… and Wisdom to know the difference. " Perfect.
More than half of all women are perfectionists, and up to 10 percent are so much so that depression, eating disorders, and contemplating suicide are serious issues for them. Even milder forms of perfectionism can rob one of happiness. Use of anti-depressants, treatment for anorexia, obesity, and suicide aren’t just national statistics-central Illinois has contributed to those increasing numbers.
The need to excel seems to be present at younger and younger ages. Beginning with pre-school enrollment, children are encouraged to be perfect darlings. While some behavior is inherent, other perfectionist traits are imposed. Television and the Internet have turned everything into a competition-from owning the coolest toys to sculpting your abs into a "six pack." Today’s culture encourages stardom with voyeuristic television shows portraying every family next door as successful millionaires. Easy credit and instant access to information encourage a lifestyle that took years for our parents to achieve, if they ever did. The failure for perfectionists is in not "arriving" fast enough.
What’s the price for compulsively seeking perfection? Sacrificing one’s happiness and sanity for a perception that others really don’t care about? Placing ultimate trust and confidence in those we perceive as perfect? Recently, religious leaders, business executives, political personalities, entertainment and sports figures, and even war heroes have suddenly toppled from their pedestals, shattering our perfect image of them. Equally damaging is holding ourselves to unattainable standards. Relationships of any kind prove difficult.
I frequently use the word "perfect" to describe my approval for something or someone but know the definition itself is flawed. The best we can do. Satisfaction in a job well done. Health. Happiness. Contentment and peace with life. Each must seek those ideals according to her own opinion of perfect.
"God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change…Courage to change the things I can… and Wisdom to know the difference. " Perfect.